Peter Berg Readies Battleship for Summer 2011

Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows - Part II, Star Trek 2, Spider-Man 4, Green Lantern and Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides are some of many tentpoles being lined up for Summer 2011. Between now and then, there will be plenty of others positioned in key weekends. In fact, it's looking increasingly like it could be a repeat of 2007 which was stuffed with mega releases left and right.

According to Variety, a less-than-likely film has been lined up for the 4th of July weekend in the form of Battleship. That's right, the one based on the Hasbro board-game. Universal has lined Peter Berg for directing duties with their sights set for a July 1st release.

In terms of just what the Hell a Battleship film would be about (besides the inevitable "You sunk my battleship!" jokes), Berg described it to the trades as "a contemporary story of an international five-ship fleet engaged in a very dynamic, violent and intense battle." Uh, OK.

What makes this all the more surprising is it follows mere weeks after the announcement of a Hancock sequel moving forward which Berg will also direct. We all just assumed it would be positioned for that summer instead.

Michael Bay Hates You

Audiences walked out of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen saying, "Why did I waste my time and money on such garbage?" Hell they seem to be getting sick of Megan Fox while they're at it. Good for them. Sure, I've felt this way dating back to the first film from 2007. But it's better late than never.

Nonetheless the sequel still made a fortune at the box-office. So now Paramount is moving forward on Transformers 3. I know you can hardly contain yourselves at the thought of more explosions, camera-fucking Fox and Uncle Tom robots. Now Michael Bay's official website gives a head's up:

• He will be meeting later this week with Steven Spielberg, and Ehren Kruger to discuss ideas for Transformers 3. By the end of the week he should have an idea if Transformers 3 will hit your local cineplex in the summer of 2011 or 2012.
• In the meantime "Pain & Gain" is looking very possible as is...
• ...Bad Boys 3. Either film coming to a theater near you before or after Transformers 3.

Of course, Bay and the studio previously had it out over a release date after they went ahead and announced Transformers 3 for July 1st 2011. Bay himself claimed they'd already agreed to 2012 instead.

Considering that 2011 is turning out to be one stuffed summer, my guess would be they opt to go for the latter date which doesn't have too terribly many tentpoles set up yet. That would also give Bay enough time to get either Pain & Gain or Bad Boys off the ground by then. Then again, I'll avoid a third Transformers film like I did Revenge of the Fallen. So fuck it. Release it whenever the Hell you want, Bay.

Chris Evans Confirms Non-Participation in Fantastic Four Reboot

I’ve always gotten the impression that Chris Evans didn’t care for the Fantastic Four films. But no matter how bad they were, that franchise opened doors for him that weren’t there before. So he keeps his thoughts on the final product to himself because he realizes what they’ve done for him. And that is the reason why I like the guy and hate some ungrateful bitch like Megan Fox or Katherine Heigl. AKA the “biting the hand that feeds you” mentality.

But it feels like said series is also keeping him from breaking out as a bona fide movie-star. That or his agent sucks. Either one. Seriously, the guy has genuine charisma on screen and would be better suited to headline Paramount’s (eventual) Jack Ryan reboot instead of being stuck in crap like Push. Then again The Losers could be good and he is in Scott Pilgrim vs. the World.

And now with 20^th Century Fox commencing on a reboot of the FF franchise, nerds across the Internet can’t help but wonder if Evans (without question the only good thing to come from said films in addition to Michael Chiklis’ Ben Grimm) could possibly retain the role of Johnny “Human Torch” Storm.

Cinematical had a brief chat with Evans on the matter who confirms that he's won't be "flaming on" (OK, I actually wasn't trying to make a tasteless joke there!) anytime soon:

"I don't think I'm going to be involved in it. I would imagine a reboot would be -- a reboot! I think they're going to start from scratch and that's the way those movies go.”

If any studio were to reboot a franchise but still keep some of their lead actors, it'd be Fox.

Indy 5 Has a Story According to Harrison Ford

I’m not going to spend this article (or 80-90% of it) talking about how Indiana Jones & the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was a colossal disappointment for most people. Nor will I point that it’s monster box-office was mostly attributed to nostalgia and everyone’s desire to that character again - regardless of quality storytelling.

Now I could say that audiences might sit the next Indiana Jones film out were it to happen. But we all know I'd be dead-wrong on that one.

No, I’ll just nicely report that Harrison Ford is following George Lucas and Shia LaBeouf in the “Oh, a fifth movie might happen after all” quote department. He revealed recently to France’s Le Figaro (via People) that Indiana Jones & the Search for Some Supernatural Bullshit looks to be moving forward after they (Spielberg, Lucas and him) agreed to a story that Lucas is “actively at work” on. If he likes the script, then he’s “very happy to put the costume on again.”

With all due respect, what I think he meant to say was, “If I get paid as much as I did last time, then ‘Fuck yeah!’ I’m coming back.”

Also no word if Mrs. Henry Jones Jr. (Karen Allen) or Spielberg's Golden Boy (LaBeouf) are planning to return.

UPDATE: Speaking of Marion Ravenwood Jones, Brendon Connelly of /film has a fairly-recent video clip up of Karen Allen from the 2009 Dragon Con. Allen claims that a "friend" in Los Angeles told her that Indiana Jones 5 had been officially announced (...the fuck?) for a Summer 2012 release. See for yourself.

Movie Moan - Some People Sort Of Ruin Their Lives To Be In There

The title of this week's edition of Movie Moan comes from Jillian, the young daughter of Steve Wiebe - the protagonist of The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters. That wonderful documentary from 2007 is the subject of this week's "Moanin 'Bout a Movie."

But before dissecting into why grown 30 to 40 something year-old men would truly care about a video-game record, Phil, Ed and Jamie chat up the latest happenings in film-news. Timothy Dalton joins the cast of next summer's Toy Story 3, and Phil & Jamie's joy in seeing more people finally appreciating his tenure as James Bond. Warner Brothers is finally catching up with Marvel with the formation of DC Entertainment and what this means for Superman, Wonder Woman, The Flash and the rest. Dare we say, the invisible jet will finally grace the silver screen, perhaps?

The guys also chat up the "off-again, on-again" (and in all probability"off yet again") status of Akira. But most important comes the realization that an A-Team film is actually happening as it appears that UFC's "Rampage" Jackson and Distrcit 9's Sharlto Copley fill out the group as B.A. Baracus and "Howling Mad" Murdock. Awesomeness, indeed.

Movie Moan - Some People Sort Of Ruin Their Lives To Be In There

News, Rumors & 100% Grade-A Internet Bullshit - Disney D23 Edition

Right now, the Mouse is whipping their junk out and showing everyone their plans with the next couple of years worth of tentpoles. The Disney D23 convention (as its called) has revealed quiet a shitload's worth of news. So here's what has been shown so far:

- Via Coming Soon, Pirates of the Caribbean 4 already has Jack Sparrow (aka Johnny Depp) returning, a script in the works from creators/screenwriters Terry Rossio and Ted Elliot and a new director in the form of Rob Marshall. Well, they now have a new subtitle (On Stranger Tides), a new logo (shown on the above link...Meh...) and a new release date (Summer 2011). Meanwhile, Pixar’s John Carter of Mars will hit cinemas the following year in Summer 2012. Expect “intense” special effects.

- He’s got so many other cool-sounding projects on his “To Do” list. What’s the harm in more for the great Guilleromo del Toro? As Variety reports, The Hobbit director has struck a deal with Disney to produce darker animated fare with his new “Double Dare You” label that will also churn out books, merchandising and all other kinds of crap the Mouse can think up. Project numero uno will be Trollhunters based on an original story of his. I myself will dare anyone to not be excited about this news!

- Pixar has proven time and time (…and time…) again that they’re 100% about casting the perfect actors for their animated films instead of just grabbing some “Flavor of the Week” asswipe (read: DreamWorks). Further proof comes with the Empire report that Timothy “My James Bond approach predates Craig by 20 years!” Dalton has joined the cast of Toy Story 3. The Flash Gordon actor (who jokes aside was an awesome 007!) will play Mr. Pricklepants, a hedgehog toy with “thespian tendencies.” Also from the same article comes confirmation to what many of us suspected in term’s of the “threequel’s” plot. Andy grows up and the toys are on their own. Expect “When She Loved Me” reactions next summer.

- Speaking of the World's Greatest Film Magazine, that Cars sequel that nobody cares about has an official plot synopsis that involves a countries-spanning race, a British secret agent (presumably not 007) and a "Hitchcokian" mistaken identity case concerning Larry the Cable Guy's Matter. Look, I think Cars was great and a solid entry in the Pixar library. But whose honestly clamoring for a sequel to it?

- Oh and that awesome sounding Muppet movie that Nick Stoller and Jason Segal (the director and star of Forgetting Sarah Marshall that they also wrote together) are working on? It has a title - The Cheapest Muppet Movie Ever Made. As per Coming Soon.

Smith & Theron Return For Hancock Sequel

I’m not one of those people who believe that just because I hated a film everyone else did too. Far from it, audiences ate up cinematic shit buckets like the Pirates of the Caribbean sequels and both Transformers like it was ice cream. That's fine and I get that. I just can’t think of too many people who actually enjoyed the “Will Smith as an alcoholic dickhead superhero” vehicle Hancock back in July 2008.

But Smith’s an honest-to-God movie star (very few of those around – the others being Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt and Tom Hanks) who will bring in audiences at packed cinema-house no matter what he headlines. Unless it’s Seven Pounds, apparently.

We heard a few weeks ago that Sony and director Peter Berg were moving forward on a sequel going as far to hire screenwriters.  Now Berg confirms to MTV what we had already assumed by this point. Will Smith will return to done the leather eagle-logoed suit again in addition to his immortal super-powered God co-star Charlize Theron and presumably Jason Bateman (aka the only person who walked away from that clutterfuck mess with dignity intact). And there will apparently be a third God introduced (the villain I guess?) with a “well-known name” actor being eyed for the role.

Smith’s worldwide popularity notwithstanding, this sounds like the cast and crew are more interested in exploring the “mythology” from Hancock than everyone else. So don't be surprised if this is another Angels & Demons where the sequel does half of the box-office from the first film.

By the Power of Grayskull, Get He-Man a Home!

Now that Warner Brothers is getting their shit together with DC Entertainment (as well as the final two Harry Potter films and the two-part Hobbit), looks like there isn't a place for He-Man and the gang from Masters of the Universe. Sounds like good old "creative differences" reared its ugly head as the studio decided to let its option expire. Now Mattel is off to find someone else willing to break their piggy-bank to get this made.

Tagging along with them is John Stevenson who was lined up for his live-action directorial debut by the Brothers Warners and producer Joel Silver (whose now off the project as well). This is all according to Variety.

Strike that. Latino Review flat out called this just under a year ago. Not word-for-word obviously. But in their own article detailing the shenanigans going on, they revealed that the studio was never really that keen on the property, couldn't successfully get a "big-name" director attached and the key executives who championed the new He-Man film left for greener pastures.

So props to El Mayimbe for hitting the nail with the hammer on this one.

From District 9 to the A-Team?

Oddly enough, I was thinking that he would be a perfect fit for Reed Richards in the Fantastic Four reboot. But maybe that's just me. Well it appears that studios across town are clamoring to work with District 9 star Sharlto Copley after making such a splash this past summer. Many (including yours truly) are hoping the Academy will get off their fucking high-horse and give the guy a much deserved "Best Actor" Oscar nomination next year. It'll never happen, I know.

Now Black Film is reporting that 20th Century Fox and the producers of the A-Team (which just recently found their B.A. Baracus in "Rampage" Jackson) have sent out an offer to the actor/producer to play "Howling Mad" Murdock. I figured this would have been the first cast among the group as it seemed to be the easiest. Shows what I know.

Quiet a few actors were linked to the role ranging from the "so high profile there's no way in Hell it'll happen" (i.e. Jim Carrey) to the "so easy it borders on type-casting" (i.e. Sam Rockwell). It's such an intriguing choice that it shows the filmmakers aren't aiming at making another Starsky & Hutch and Copley will most definitely get a nice pay-bump after District 9's killer box-office as well as getting his name further out there. So a win-win deal if I've ever seen one.

Rampage Will Pity the Fools

The prospects of an A-Team movie never appealed to me personally. Not a strike against it, mind you. I just never cared. We all knew there would eventually be a film-version – especially compared to far worse television shows being adapted to the silver screen.

It was just a matter of who would be cast. And I must say I do like who Joe Carnahan and his team have lined up so far (i.e. Liam Neeson as Hannibal Smith and Bradley Cooper as Face) even though they weren’t exactly who I had in mind. For the record, I had Kurt Russell and Jason Bateman in those perspective roles.

Nonetheless the biggest question mark has been who will fill in the boots of B.A. Baracus made famous by Mr. T back in the early-to-mid 80s. According to the Vancouver Sun, the gang has found their “Bad Ass” in former UFC champ Quinton “Rampage” Jackson who previously met with the producers and was said to have arrived this past holiday weekend.

Can’t say I’m a regular watcher of Ultimate Fighting Championship nor could I name you a single person involved. Now as little kid, I was obsessed with both WWF and WCW wrestling. That aside, Jackson certainly looks the part and I’m sure he’ll be fine.

Somewhere in the world right now, Michael Clarke Duncan is pissed.