Spoiler Alert! Uncle Ben Dies in The Amazing Spider-Man!

You get an actor like Martin Sheen as Uncle Ben in The Amazing Spider-Man, and you automatically know that 1) we're going to hear the "With great power comes great responsibility" speech and B) we'll definitely see him croak.

Some snap-shots taken of Sheen and newbie web-slinger Andrew Garfield on set (as per On Location Vacations) confirm the latter.

Interesting to note Marc Webb & Co. opted to make the same dramatic call as Sam Raimi and his team did ten years ago by having Peter Parker present to see his dear old uncle die.

Not a bad call in the slightest, I remember seeing Spider-Man in theaters and thinking, "Hey that's different from the comics!" but in a good way. To have him being told "Oh yeah, by the way, your uncle just got shot off-screen" may be fine for a comic-book, but that shit doesn't fly for a movie.

Straw Dogs Remake Trailer or Whatever Happened to Richard White?

Being a Southerner, it's always both amusing and frustrating to see how we're depicted by Hollywood every couple of years. I like a good joke at my home's experience as long as said gag is funny and, of course, I don't take it personal. But then you see more and more portrayals of my neck of the woods from filmmakers, a large portion of whom (not all to be fair) don't even hail from around here and I always wonder, "Is that what you really think of us? If so, would you be OK were I to do stereotypes of you?"

Which brings me to the subject of this article, a trailer for Rob Lurie’s (unnecessary as all Hell) Straw Dogs remake has hit the interwebs via Yahoo! Movies.

As a film fan, I never liked the notion of updating Sam Peckinpah's original but it's never a bad thing to be optimistic that maybe (just...maybe) Lurie could bring something different to the table. Judging by the trailer, the answer is an epic "Nope!"

 It also doesn't help his cause that he hired James Marsden, of all people, in the lead role. Now Marsden has the looks and charm of a leading man but the skills of a character actor. But Lurie & Co. are going out of their way to make him look weak and dweeby. They're clearly going for a Cillian Murphy look. As much as I like Marsden, why didn't they, oh I don't know, get Murphy in the first place? I'm sorry, but I don't buy that Marsden can't hold his own against Alexander Skarsgård and his rag-tag group of sweaty (because all of us down here do nothing but sweat, you know), church-going (and implied Bible-thumping), Kate Bosworth ass-ogling red-necks.

Fright Night Remake Looks Like a Slicked Up Version of the Original - Minus the Charm

That Fright Night remake dropping later this summer has been off my radar, I'll admit. But not out of ill-will against it, no, as big a fan I am of Tom Holland's 1985 horror/comedy, the notion of a teenager discovering his next-door neighbor is a vampire (and his recruiting a past-his-prime horror icon to help kill the blood-sucker) is one that an update could be interesting. I also happen to like the cast they've assembled and filmmakers behind the camera.

Alas, the trailer courtesy of IGN Movies is, for me, on the bland side. It all looks so...studio slick 'n' glossy for lack of a better term.

And the most intriguing element of this update for me is all but absent (save for a couple of quick seconds); former Doctor Who David Tennant as the revamped Peter Vincent whose gone from schlocky horror-movie-hero to Criss Angel-like illusionist. Also yeah, I'll be the douche to say it. Did we just watch the whole damn movie in two and a half minutes?

Horrible Bosses Looks Like the Anti-Change-Up - Translation: Funny

Here's the other Jason Bateman co-starring comedy this summer, Horrible Bosses. And judging by this trailer, this actually looks to be funny – too bad the same can't be said for The Change-Up.

Well, that got plenty of chuckles outta me. I just hope they actually go through with the rather-dark angle for this black comedy. I mean surely one of the bosses will in fact get killed?

Also a plus the dependably-annoying Jennifer Anniston actually isn't a pain-in-the-ass to watch this time. Although since Horrible Bosses doesn't open for another two months, there's still time for more tabloid bullshit about her "hooking up" for yet another co-star.

Way to Spoil Expendables 2, Plot Synopsis!

Isn't it a bit on the "soon-ish" side of things to blow a major death for The Expendables 2?

First Showing has the teaser poster and courtesy of /film, here's the plot synopsis that effectively confirms the one interesting aspect of the first film won't be around too terribly long for the sequel next August:

"The Expendables are back and this time it’s personal! After Tool (Mickey Rourke), the heart and soul of the Expendables, is brutally murdered on a mission, his comrades swear to avenge him. They’re not the only ones who want blood. Tool’s beautiful young and wild daughter Fiona embarks on her own revenge mission, complicating matters when she is captured and ransomed by a ruthless dictator plotting to destroy a resistance movement. Now Barney and the Expendables must risk everything to save her and humanity."

This, taking one look at Immortals, Passion Play, what the Hell, Rourke? Are you purposefully gunning to go right back into C-movie schlock?

Real Steel Trailer Might As Well Have Included Burt Young as Paulie

Is this the most over-the-top we've seen Hugh Jackman? Do the robots have artificial-intelligence but have to be controlled by humans during the boxing-game? Why am I talking about a fucking robot boxing-movie, in the first place? Am I taking this too seriously because of the intense heat?

Just some of the burning questions racing through my head while watching the new trailer for Real Steel, courtesy of Yahoo! Movies.

Dinosaurs Versus Aliens Could Be Best Worst Combo Since Nuts & Gum

It's almost like Will Smith and Barry Sonnenfeld have both during the course of this troubled Men in Black 3(D) production looked in the mirror and asked, "What am I doing?"

In the case of Smith, odds are looking good for him to star in Quentin Tarantino's Django Unchained. Yes, Smith's shown he can get past his longtime on-autopilot movie-star "Aw Hell nah!" persona onscreen and deliver a worthwhile performance. It's encouraging to the cause to hear (via Variety) that he's been actively looking to work with filmmakers ready and willing to push him and, best of all in the cast of a production like this, waver his (admittedly well-deserved) top-dollar salary.

So what the Hell is Sonnenfeld doing? According to "TOLDJA," more crap is in his future. He's attached to direct and no, I'm not joking, Dominion: Dinosaurs Versus Aliens. It's said to be based on a forthcoming graphic novel from comics-writer Grant Morrison who will also adapt the story into screenplay form.

Something about a "secret prehistoric world war battle" or some crap involving smarter-than-the-average T-Rex fighting off an alien invasion. To be honest, I can't dog the man too much. He's never been a filmmaker I've personally founding interesting; just a poor man's Tim Burton, and you know how sick and tired of Burton's shtick I am.

Spielberg's Lincoln Casting Up – Both in Quantity & Quality

And to think I was worried Steven Spielberg's Lincoln was cresting.

THR says the Beard is arranging quite the gun-show of characters-actors for this period piece epic with Daniel Day-Lewis in the title role and Sally Field as his wife.

The newbies to the cast includes Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Robert Todd Lincoln, the only child of the President's to make it into adulthood and Tommy Lee Jones as Republican congressman Thaddeus Stevens who helped considerably in the legislation for the Civil War. Those two are only ones with specified roles, at the moment. The others are *deep breath* Joseph Cross (Milk), John Hawkes (recent Oscar nominee for Winter's Bone), Hal Holbrook (most recently Into the Wild and just showed up in Water for Elephants), Bruce McGill (D-Day in Animal House among many other roles over the years), Tim Blake Nelson (you kids know known him best for his "Sequel set-up" role in The Incredible Hulk) and James Spader (from Boston Legal with William Shatner, duh!)

Beyond how great this cast is coming together, things are looking especially up for Levitt - explains why he's not showing up for G.I. Joe 2: Cobra Strikes.

Dark Tower Ain’t Looking So Hot

If making three Lord of the Rings movies with a massive budget, done entirely in New Zealand with an acclaimed filmmaker known for no-budget cult fare at the helm and a cast filled with character-actors and unknowns is understandably considered a risk (and that was a widely-known and beloved book trilogy), then Universal and Ron Howard's intentions for The Dark Tower could be deemed down-right suicidal.

Doing a film trilogy and two limited-run television series from the Stephen King books was always too ambitious of a plan for my money, and the studio is starting to get cold feet reports Variety.

Word is executives are expected to meet in the next couple of days to make a call: either stay the course and continue on their original plans, keep the property there but make drastic calls like possibly killing the television component or just making one movie or throw it into turnaround (aka kill it, and let the filmmakers/production company, this in case Howard and partner Brian Grazer's Imagine Entertainment, take it elsewhere to other hopeful buyers).

Let's put it this way, when a "safe bet" for Universal is making a Jason Bourne movie with the character's name flashed all over the title but he’s not actually in it, then you know where something like Dark Tower stands there. My guess is they let it go, and in the event of a rival studio grabs it ASAP, their game plan gets changed big time.

Anyone In the Mood For a Twins Sequel?

In addition to Three Men & a Linda Hunt, I'd also like to see a reboot of Twins where the mother literally gives birth to Danny De Vito and Arnold Schwarzenegger as they physically are right now. Tracy Morgan would play the doctor delivering them and he’d say something like, "Damn! That va-jay-jay is torn. UP!"

So, Arnold is serious about getting back into movies. I say, "Rock on!" but per cautiously as a fan. The notion of a "Getting the old gang back together" angle for Terminator 5 is genius when you think about it (and no, I don't believe its director Justin Lin has "debunked" anything – news flash, filmmakers, actors, etc. lie when info leaks!) and I like that he's taking on Cry Macho as Vulture says for his first post-Gubernatorial starring role.

But as my opening, tasteless joke suggests, there appears to be interest in also having all the guys back in one movie for a Twins sequel as What's Playing reports:

"A Twins sequel. Knowing Arnold, Danny De Vito and Ivan Reitman are all still in touch and want to work together again, Universal came to them about it. It’s a germ of an idea that could spread fast."

This feels like some consolation prize for Reitman since Ghostbusters 3 will likely never happen. Thank God.